the beach

if you google image "the beach" the first few dozen photos are terrible.

my hair smells funny.

As of lately Ive made it my goal to be a total wasteoid of life. But since I have suceeded .... I have also failed.

Wonderwall

I bailed on swim lessons...

Last week when I went to Hobby Lobby (Hob Lob) to get christmas decorations I saw a tiny sign that said a cake decorating class was going to happen soon but I forgot about it and instead signed up for swim lessons...BUT THEN I was on the hobby lobby website looking for coupons and I realized that the class starts tomorrow...so cake decorating won.  I think my sudden change of heart happened because im obsessed with the cooking channel and they had some cupcake thing on last night and I was all " I wanna do something other than what Im doing now!" then BAM

tuna (still on that) & then an olive tapenade on the cucumbers. After that Ill have like like four chocolate chip cookies and pass out.

did you eat a tuna sandwich in bed ?

The answer is NO why would I eat anything up there when there isnt even a a tv. But tyler asking me that really made me want a tuna sandwich and so when I went to the store and looked at the tuna in the deli I was grossed out. It looked more like mayo soup. Anyways when I was like ten I would make ketchup and tuna sandwiches on toasted bread ... i wonder why no one in my house ever asked me to make one for them?

 tuna, mayo, capers, spicy brown mustard and tomato. When I can I try to buy organics but its hard living in tiny town and its depressing thinking about driving an hour and a half one way just to be able to get some organic mayo up in here.

I imagine my sandwich talking and saying " im soooooo gooood dont you want to take a giant bite out of me ? I bet you could finish me in four bites...im soooooo much better looking than that stupid rice cooker behind me." and then i say SHUT UP SANDWICH and i start to eat my lunch.

monday.

People are seriously acting like its the end of days at work. I saw two grown men arguing over an apple pie which is ridiculous because sweet potato is so much better. I think holidays just put people in this weird shopping frenzy Im sure they are usually kindhearted humans but this week Im glad I wear glasses so the eye gauging will be a lil bit harder for them to do. Sunday I left work at 2 and basically bolted for the door Im not even sure if I clocked out now that I think about it. I came home and ate because 1.) I was hungry and 2.) because work had been stressful. 

We're HUGE fans of fried pickles (is that just a southern thing ?) and theres a few restaurants around that make them but mostly it seems like greasy bar food. Sonic actually does friend pickles but they taste...fake ? Anyways we bought a giant jar of dill pickles like gas station giant and I dipped them in an egg, milk, hot sauce bath and then coated them with flour, salt, and pepper fried them in peanut oil for litterally not even two minutes and they were sooooooooo good. It made me forget about ridiculous holoday shoppers until I had to go back to work this morning.

McSalad Shaker where did you go ?

In elementary school I would leave my house with an empty lunch box and my mom would go through a McDonalds drive thru and order me a McSalad Shaker. At lunch I would pull it out like " OH this ? Yea my mom doesnt need to worry herself with making me a lame sandwich when genius stuff like this exists." I remember this one day Carter (this boy who had some sort of problem with .... blood sugar ? I just remember he would have to take medicine alot and his mom came on every field trip to make sure he was ok. He was also a lunch boxer because he couldnt have school meals because of the special diet he was on.) Anyways one day Carter asked if he could shake my salad and Ive always remembered that as one of the best things anyone has ever asked me. I was really weird about how I made my salad though and would lay out a napkin on the table and pour half the salad out and then pour my dressing in and then add a little salad at a time while I shook it so that the dressing didnt just stick to the top.

I think I read somewhere that the McSalad Shaker is in the top ten of failed ideas tried by McDonalds which makes me really angry because that STUPID mc rib is back and looks disgusting and if I were starving on a an island and the only thing to eat was a mc rib I would only eat bbq bread. (im starving on an island ! im not going to waste the entire thing ! )

miss you McSalad Shaker we had some special times. Shout out to Garden...you were my favorite. R.I.P